Meditation should be done sitting, right?
I’m beginning to think that there is a flaw in this plan, at least for me. When I sit my mind has too much freedom. It looks for things to occupy it. Every noise or breeze is a distraction. I focus on my breath but then I start to notice that my breath is ragged and uneven no matter how I much I focus on making it smooth and even it seems to just get worse. Obviously, I’m not heaving or anything, so this is a delusion.
Walking meditation is better but if I do it in a group setting I tend to focus on not walking into the person in front of me a lot more than on anything else. My sangha is Chinese so they sometimes incorporate random Pureland elements such as chanting. I always end up chanting “I love tofu,” because I do and it means as much to me as the Mandarin words that our super-awesome English Dharma Group leader has carefully pronounced for us. Still not enough, really.
I’ve found that cleaning meditation is very useful for me becasue I cna be very mindful whil doing it and it’s jsut enough agitation to my body to keep my mind from wandering. Specifically, I like washing dishes. Sweeping is also good. Both of these I hated doing before becasue of their mundane and repetitive nature. This is exactly what makes them perfect meditation vehicles.
I’m alos going to start walking meditation on my own every morning. I think it might give me the focus and the metta-fuel, as it were, to get through the day.